In the past several weeks I have become very upset with myself…the what and why are difficult to pin point. There a parts of days (like now) when I almost fee despondent. I know part of it is because I don’t really get a good nights sleep and am frustrated by the fact that I have other little ticks and twitches that are bothering me. Itchy bug and spider bits, 10 lbs I can’t see to shake off, the sense that I am wandering aimlessly through the remaining years of my life. Yeh…I guess you could call it a form of depression. I daydream about things that might have been and a reality that isn’t and maybe never was. If I am this lethargic now what will it be like when I’m not working two jobs?